It’s hard to be in a relationship where you are trying to be there for someone but seems like they don’t actually need your presence. It’s like they tell you to go away when all they wanted was for you to stay and always be there. It may sound complicated, but for most people with Graves’ disease, their relationship can be put at risk if they don’t start acting on it.
The Lessons
The lesson you can get from the situation where the disease is present in your significant other is that things can change in an instant. You might experience a lot of emotional stress out of nowhere because you are trying to figure out your partner’s emotional struggle as well. Being with someone that suffers from the autoimmune disorder is a big challenge that can either teach you to push through with the situation or you just give up. Either way, both of the results can cause too many sufferings and heartaches.
The Struggle
Apart from being the center of your partner’s energy, you become the fortress of yourself too. The only way you can understand your significant other’s condition is by embracing the hardships it can cause in your relationship. By that, you have to become considerate enough not only for your partner but also for yourself. You need to understand that loving someone that has this kind of situation requires your full support. The disease requires you to make extreme adjustments for you to be able to lend a hand.
The Difficult Part
The thing that you can consider as the most challenging part of living with someone who has Graves’ disease is seeing your partner suffer from it. It’s where you can honestly do nothing about his or her condition. It pains to know that all the changes that might happen are due to the disorder but you can never complain about it. It’s like you’re stuck with someone that you love who turns out to become a different person in just a matter of seconds. It feels like there’s not enough effort that can show your significant other that you indeed care about both your situations. There are tons of back and forth, and sometimes it just makes you feel uncomfortable, weak and lost.
You might think about how the disease is affecting your relationship and how it changes your partner into someone you don’t want him or her to become. But thinking about the struggle they have, they don’t want this either. The truth is, they don’t want to hurt you, but they know they’re actually doing it. They also know that they can’t do anything about it, which makes it more complicated on their part.
Appreciating and accepting someone you love who is suffering from Graves’ disease is the best thing you can do. I know it will be a tough decision to make, but when you know that your significant other is worth the effort and that your presence is their only way to get stronger, you’ll eventually learn to adapt and see things from a different perspective.
Here are some statements that you need to learn from therapists:
- “A good partner also is honest, respectful, loyal, forgiving and humble.” – Jenifer Hope, LCPC
- “Trust issues are developed from pain in prior relationships.” – Rabbi Shlomo Slatkin MS, LCPC
- “What’s important here is allowing yourself to feel the pain of rejection without getting stuck or avoiding how you feel.” – Rachel Dack, MC, LCPC